Maui, signs of sorts

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/show/with/6299586641/

Maui Dive 2006

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157628006083596/show/

Diving off the Pali, Kihei Maui 2006

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/show/

retired husbands

I love this one

 

RETIRED HUSBAND  After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to K-Mart Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.  Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from our local K-Mart: Dear Mrs Harris,  Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:  1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.  2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.  3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.  4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.  5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.  6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.  7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.  8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.  9.. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.  10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.  11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.  12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.  13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'  14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'  And last, but not least:  15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out. If you don't send this to your dearest friends, you will be depriving them of some good humor.

 

Lanai, another island of Hawaii

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157627985574250/show/

Big Island of Hawaii 2005

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157627970643082/show/

Maui 2005

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157627845864031/show/

The bird life of Midway Atoll

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157627815863499/show/

Midway Atoll through the camera lenses

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157627933382636/show/

Midway Atoll Marine Debris and Wildlife

http://www.flickr.com//photos/67188368@N07/sets/72157627793619285/show/

US/Canada Travels for 2011 Statistics.........or lies

US/Canada Travels for 2011 Statistics

Some of these stats might come as a surprise to many but believe me
it's the truth as well as the Greynomad recollects………..maybe.

Goatmobile: 2011 Toyota Tacoma 4WD with a long bed. What this really
means is that Toyota added another 6" inches to the length of the
truck bed……. Anything to generate another dollar.

Mileage: 25,000
Tyres: Replaced the originals at the 15,000 mark with Goodyear's

Windows: Had to replace the back window after the bloody camper shell
managed to poke a hole in it as I made a very sharp turn for the McDonalds
Senior discounted coffee.

Modifications: A tree managed to dent the passenger door as I was
Driving down a narrow nasty dirt road meant for small ATV's.

Pop-up Camper Shell that managed to have enough holes in it to allow
the arrival of mosquitoes, biting black flies, No see ums and any
other
Insect that had a taste for blood. Though the camper was a bit rough at times
anything beats sleeping in the Honda Element or a 2 man tent while on the
road.

Food: California Dates, Cliff Bars (organic power bar), Hummus, box wine,
unsalted shell peanuts, crackers, cream cheese, milk, cereal, baked
beans (large can) and you wonder why I had gas and heart
burn……………….and of course gallons and gallons of Aloha Tea (name
brand).

Medical: Except for the vast volume of gas which turned the clear
plastic windows in the camper black and the spider bites in Missouri
that gave me
horrible rash on my inner thigh, life was good. Of course the life saving
container of the whole trip was me liter pee bottle at the top of the
list for items of connivence especially late at night. For those who
were blessed by my presents you just might have wondered why a
specific area around the camper had a very green look to it. WELL
think of these areas as blessed by a liquid fertilizer not found on
the open market…………..

Navigation: Garmin GPS for the vehicle and a hand held Garmin 450T for
the Geocaches. The software for the vehicle GPS must have been written
by the village idiot but you learn to very quickly to question the
directions as given.
Stayed off the freeways or main roads and would try if possible never
to go through a major city. Just the thought of traffic, noise, and
people had me go miles out of my way to void Joe Redneck and his 12
dogs.

Where: Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, Oregon, Washington,
Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Alaska, Idaho, Montana, North
Dakota,
Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan, Indiana, Pennsylvania, Virginia,
Maryland, West Virginia, Illinois, and Missouri, are we there
yet………….! where the Goatmobile is under the care of Mrs. Green, the
carbon footprint Toyota Prius nut case.

RV Sites: On the cheap especially in Canada when I could find a dirt
road or a truck lay-by. In the states it was the National Forest,
Military Bases, Army Corp of Engineers Recreational sites. Lets not
forget all of those good people who put up with me at their abodes of
4 walls with a blue tarp and the outhouse with a library of ads from
the local nunnery…

Right now I am in the process of flogging as much of my Hawaii house
gear as possible thinking that I will be doing this traveling bit full
time while renting out my townhouse with its 15,000 square feet under
the roof for $2.50 per month.
The reason the rent is so cheap is the goats, sheep, and beef cattle
that live under the townhouse for which I collect the dropping for
fuel during the cold Hawaiian winter months.

Other then that good friends I must say aloha and mahalo for staying
with me these last 10 months. Next year looks to be as good if not
better.

The Greynomad

LET'S SEE IF I GOT THIS CORRECT?

LET'S SEE IF I GOT THIS  CORRECT?   RE: 3 American Hikers In The NEWS ------------------------------------------------------------------- IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER  ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR. IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER  ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.  IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER  ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.  IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER  ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.  IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER  ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.  IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU  WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED. IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY  YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL PRISON TO ROT.  IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET ! A JOB,         A DRIVERS LICENSE,  SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,    WELFARE,  FOOD STAMPS,    CREDIT CARDS,  SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,    FREE EDUCATION, FREE HEALTH CARE,  A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE  THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY'S FLAG WHILE YOU  PROTEST THAT YOU DON'T GET ENOUGH RESPECT  AND, IN MANY INSTANCES, YOU CAN VOTE.  I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON THE "SITUATION"!   KEEP THIS GOING.....FORWARD TO YOUR FRIENDS & FAMILY  IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP AMERICA !